Friday, April 27, 2012


Father Tasto,

Last Sunday my family and I decided to come back to church. We were members of St. Thomas for at least 3 years and attended regularly until the birth of my third son. Life got in the way and went hadn’t been back on a regular basis for a good three years. Occasionally my husband and my oldest son, who’s eight would attend mass. After having a pleasurable experience at our in-laws church in Fond du Lac Wisconsin, we decided it was time to get the family back to church on a regular basis. 

We loaded everyone into the van and drove to the 11 a.m. mass. We arrived and unloaded from the van. When we got to the entrance, we headed straight to the elevator, as our 6 year old is profoundly disabled and requires a wheelchair for mobility. My husband waited in front of the elevator while I escorted my four and eight year old to the main level. My boys were actually very excited to go to church, we waited for my husband and other son by the elevator. After a few minutes, a boy handing out programs informed me that the elevator was broken. My boys and I went to the front entrance because I thought surely there was a ramp entrance. Out of all the many doors to enter the church, none of these was accessible without the elevator. By that time my husband had met us on the front walkway where we were faced with about fourteen steps to climb.

Unfortunately I am not strong enough to help my husband lift the chair up the steps.

The thing that struck me the most that morning was the fact that as I stood with my family, I watched as my fellow parishioners walked by us. No one gave us a second glance. I would normally go inside and ask for help lifting the wheelchair. But because others were not concerned with our plight I was very discouraged. I started to cry on the front walkway as people continued to walk by us. My tears turned to many; this was not the first time my son in the wheelchair had been left out. My eight year old held my hand and told me it would be okay.

No one offered help, or even inquired what was wrong.  

We walked back to our van and went home.

I write this not to inform you of a problem with the building’s accessibility issues, but more to inform you of your parishioners lack of compassion. I am not one to judge others nor do I expect too much from anyone else. But I would hope that if I was on my way to church and I saw a mother crying with a son in a wheelchair at the base of the stairs, someone would stop and offer some kind of assistance. Surely not getting to church on time can be forgiven if you are helping someone get there too.

Thank you for your time.

Sincerely yours,

Sue Sullivan


Fawn said...

Why are people so blind? :(

Grama Joni said...

I hope you sent this to the pastor. I think it should be published in the church bulletin. In fact, it should be incorporated into the sermon.

ferfischer said...

I found you from Miracles for Mito - and I loved this post - so very real. We have also had situations where we were invisible, and we ended up accepting the fact something wasn't working and went back home. It SUCKS. Very discouraging, I can understand exactly. I hope that somehow in some other way - your faith was renewed.