Monday, December 30, 2013

Complaints of the day.

Waiting for the doctor to call back so I can beg for stronger antibiotics.
Suction machine by my feet, on phone with clueless nurse.
PTO members coming later today. Event eleven days away.
Hockey practice this afternoon, not accessible.
Therapy for Dermot and Ryan this morning.
Back ache is increasing with every day of winter break that goes by.
-12 degree air temperature outside.
No warm weather vacation in sight.
Gift Certificate to spa for Christmas, but no time to use it.
Baby sitter's last day approaching fast.
Haven't spoke to my brother is over three years.
Yelled at my boys this morning for singing.
And I miss my mom.

Trying to stay positive, trying to stay sane.

My friend shared a quote with me a few weeks ago that really pissed me off. I went on Oprah's website to see if I could find it again so I could share it with all of you. I couldn't find it. But apparently the answer to all of my problems is Gratitude.

The quote was something like: "Everyone's life is as difficult as yours" or at least that's what I heard.

Pardon me while I suction the mucus from my kids throat.

I get what it was trying to say, but I'm having a hard time believing that the women across the street in the two million dollar house is having a hard time about life. Maybe she is. Maybe her parents aren't living anymore. Maybe her baby is the first one after a long string of miscarriages. Maybe she her brother died when she was younger. Maybe she's lonely because her doctor husband is never around. Maybe her friends are shallow and she's insecure about her appearance. Maybe she just spilled her oatmeal all over her exotic wood floor in her massive dining room. I'll never know.

What I know is my reality. My troubles. My pain. I'm not going to punish myself for complaining anymore. When things are tough they are really tough. They might even get worse. I know where the joy is. I have it and am able to find it in the least opportune times.

I watch for birds-Eagles, Pileated woodpeckers, Cooper's Hawks, House finches, Brown Creepers and even little Chickadees. I find beauty in these creatures. I look for beauty. I search out eye contact from strangers and smile. I watch little kids play in the snow. I'm good with the gratitude stuff.

I just needed to complain today...